NEWS FLASH: Today in downtown Korea a runaway monkey was seen stealing a little girl’s puppy. The motive behind the pupnapping is not yet clear; however, upon inspection of the monkey’s YouTube viewing history the following video was found: How to Cook a Dog
Category Archives: Just for Laughs
Cussing for God
We had come from out of town to ascend & lay eyes on the much spoken of Angel’s Landing in Zion. Marcello and I had each invited a girl; he a proper & petite gal named Rebecca & I the great & gregarious (and previous) Kate Nichols. We stayed at my mother & step father’s place in Hurricane while down there. It was to be the girls’ first encounter with my mother, but not one easily forgotten.
The first morning there we woke up and decided to read scriptures together. It was a good study, complete with heartfelt insights. My mother came in and Marcello invited her to join our little morning devotional, and I’m glad he did. I have a feeling the glad was enjoyed by all.
Kneeling around a meticulously kept, five-sheeted, raised bed with decorative pillows in the guest room, we closed our study with prayer. No sooner had we raised our heads from addressing the God of the universe when my mother said she was reminded of a story, or rather a quote, she had heard earlier that week, in church I believe it was.
The thought came to her as if by revelation, or at the very least inspiration. So there, on the tail end of our spiritually edifying meeting, perched on the edge of the bed, we all leaned forward to pay particular attention to words this wise sage of a woman was about to speak.
She spoken slowly to make sure she got them correct, “Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning, Satan says “Oh sh**! She’s awake!”
…wide-eyed and with a slight smile cracking on each of our faces at the prayer bedside we froze to assess. There in that split second of stillness we each considered what was said, evaluated the effects that laughter would have on our souls and apparently all decided that sometimes (at the very least, this time) cussing for God is an appropriate manifestation of one’s devotion to him who created our spirits and gave us life.
We filled the room with hearty amusement and punctuated our morning with a rare glimpse into the dedication of my mother to her Heavenly Father. I guess John Mayer summed it up best in one of my favorite songs, “Say what you need to say.” Ha!
I love you Ma! Thanks for making me smile, one thing I’m not sure I could live without.
Kimchi Poetry
So, when you’re looking for a fun activity to do in a small group, try this little concoction we tried last night. Here’s all you’ll need:
One part imagination
One paper for each participant
One pencil for each
So, to begin, each person has a paper and pencil. Everyone writes a phrase on the top of the page as if they were writing a poem. Each paper is passed and a second line is written after reading the first. Here’s where it gets interesting. The second person to write a line then folds the paper back so the first phrase is no linger visible. They then pass the paper again. Each of the following people do the same so that every person writes one line with only the previous line visible.
If you’re lookin’ to add a little more spice to the game, try playing Scattergories or another word game beforehand so the group is primed to add a hearty handful of inside jokes into the delicious “Kimchi Poetry.” The name, by the way, has nothing to do with the poems themselves, it’s just a name that came out as we were talking and it stuck. However, if you were to look for some meaning to the name of the game, it may make sense that it’s just as random as the poems are. Else, some poems, after fermenting a while are really delicious to the distinguishing pallet.
Whatever you call it, it’s a fun little game, especially for those who like to write.
Following are the 10 poems that were fermented by 5 very different people! I hope you have as much fun reading them as we did creating them. I gave each a name so you can vote for your favorite at the end. Feel free to psychoanalyze the dishes to help us get to the bottom our group consciousness. Those and any other thoughts are welcome in the comments section after the poems.
Heart Conscience
For those people who enjoy water
Your conscience will like this message
If your heart can hear
Then my love will respond
To the most intimate terms of endearment
The Transformation
As he rose from the shivering grass
Blistering orbules exploded
Training my eyes to retreat
For too much is a burden in the beholding
Of this cornucopia that transfigures
Adventurous Wookie
“Forever my little Wookie,” she cooed
“Forever, forever and forever.”
On the stems of wilder wood
I rode the ultimate adventure
Because my heart was pure
Hesitant Amid Temptation
Mysterious curiosity
Beckons intensely
But I will not go
Until I can draw the right conclusions
Of what may come for Mr. Bojangles
Icicles Overboard
The spot drew my focus
And I turned my soul to meet
The icicles of the sea
Grew like bamboo
Until it reached the threshold
The Rooster’s Wit OR The Jello Epiphany
A rooster watches through the window
And he sees other humorous mannequins
Laughing at his wit
She casually jiggled her jello
To find the truth she known all along
Memories of Partridge Tree Youth
Positively delightful, the youth of Partridge Tree
Hope for living in the now
And then when we forget and trip on tomorrow
we can be propelled by these memories
Of longing, light and wit
And the whimsy of laughing daffodils
Itchaway
Dolphin cheese & killer bees
In the magic land of Itchaway
There lived a tiny lark
Who laid tiny blue eggs
An offering of conduit to future
Amphibious Youth
In the puddles of amphibious youth
My feet drew up joy leaving memories
My mind opened to a greater world
Where the tropics covered the earth
They lived in harmony
In Their Eyes
Children sometimes speak with their eyes
You just have to look deeper
Into the shallow depths of the pellucid
A glimmer of hope shone forth
And I joined the fairies in their dance
Vote for your fav & try it out yourself next group get together. We’d love to sample your juiciest & most savory Kimchi Poems! Until then!!
n
The Brian Regan Diet
I have been thinking about changing my eating habits recently. It “seems” to me that water is just fine, the foundation of ANY good diet. I’ve been informed however that I need more nutrients if I want to grow big and strong. So I’ve consulted with a nurse practitioner and she’s suggested I try the following diet. For lack of a better name, I’ll call it the Brian Regan Diet:
Breakfast: Pop Tarts
Mid Morning Snack: Fig Newtons
Lunch: Peanut Butter & Jelly
Afternoon Snack: A Donut
Dinner Party
Main Course: Head of A Pig
Desert: Cup of Dirt
It was a great birthday! Definitely one of my favorites. Thank you Michelle for putting a smile on my face…ALL DAY LONG!
Latest Spoof Candidates
So, Here’s a small list that Ashlee and I came up with for our next big debut. If ya can think of any others or have one that you wanna hear, let us know!!
- Summer Lovin’ – Grease
- U2 – Without or Without You
- Don’t Wanna Miss a Thing – Aerosmith
- Beatles
- I Wanna Hold Your Hand
- Eight Days a Week
- Unchained Melodies – Everly Brothers
- Crazy – Patsy Cline
- Endless Love
- My Heart Will Go On – Celine Dion
- Bryan Adams
- L.O.V.E.
- Under My Skin
- I Swear – All-4-One
- Hero – Enrique Eglacisas
- Amazed – Lonestar
- A Whole New World –