POWERFUL. All too many of us believe that we accomplish something by holding onto grudges. This talk deeply affected me and a good friend both. Not everyone is ready to forgive others, but if you are, take some time and check out this audio. It clearly helps one to understand the why we forgive. It releases us from pain, hurt and suffering. Like I said: POWERFUL!
Here’s a public talk available by C. Terry Warner that is along the same lines as the talk. For some reason it’s out of sync, so, it may be good to just listen to it:
This started as a comment I posted on the imported Facebook Note of my blog post Simplifying Stuff that I felt deserved it’s own showing on the floor room of my blog.
So, during this last conference I had an interesting experience. I hadn’t felt solid strength in conference for some time, ESP not like in the pre-mission college institute days. But for some reason I decided to prepare for this conference by reviewing the last one. I put out the challenge to the Walk the Talk group and got some takers. So, each day for the last 3 weeks or so I spent reading a conference talk or two, quietly each morning in my back yard with my bare feet finding solace intertwined with the long blades of grass.
It happened slowly, almost like watching my plants grow back there. But compounded over time, it WAS noticeable…I was starting to “feel” again. I was spending time in prayer asking that my eyes would see what I wasn’t seeing on my own. I was indeed seeking for answers. Answers that I needed to help me find peace that I kept grasping for, but seemed to disappear just as smoke would when trying to hold it.
It was in this simple morning ritual that I started again to feel impressions or guidances, simple, but sure direction for myself. Some things I felt impressed to do were to remove all my books from my room, reduce the time I spent working so I could have more balance and connect with friends in meaningful and guided ways.
This little effort created in me a thirst and excitement to participate in conference this time around, similar to how I used to be. And during conference I had moment after moment where I would hear a phrase resonate clearly with something I had already been moved upon to think about, write or do during my backyard study. It felt clearly like a validation from heaven. In those many moments during conference I knew that I was being led. And not all things that I felt to do during my backyard sessions were explicitly written in the words I was studying.
Such an amazing place to be, a fragile one, one that must be protected if it’s important to me. But in the end all the thanks and praise must go to the God that gave us all life and who didn’t leave us without direction here on earth. “When our sacred doctrine & beliefs are challenged,” said Bishop Edgely, as mine has been recently, “this is our opportunity to become acquainted with God in a most private and intimate manner.” ((http://new.lds.org/general-conference/sessions?lang=eng&bcpid=610705729001&bctid=623525042001))
Similarly, Brad Wilcox says on a talk tape, “We don’t have to seek out others who are struggling so we feel justified. And we certainly don’t have to hate those that don’t struggle so that we can feel better. And we don’t have to surrender to addictions and hate ourselves, as easy as that is to do. Instead, we simply have to let faith be an anchor to our souls.”
I’m not sure why those quotes came to mind, I guess it’s just that it is so easy to give in to the voices that say what we’ve known to be true isn’t. And while it is so hard to see sometimes, the help we seek is always right there, waiting for us to seek. I KNOW all it takes is a little alone time with God to reestablish again the foundations of our faith and that our faith is what anchors & grounds us. That idea I really tried to express in basic terms in my post The Essence of Prayer.
Thanks to all my friends who give my life meaning. Thanks to family who has given me much joy and opportunity to grow. And thanks to God for his patience with my wandering and for always being there to embrace me when I return to him.
I see a cliff & slowly I ascend to its peak
Standing mesmerized I scan the breathtaking view
Closed-eyed & breathing deeply its majesty fills my soul,
Confidently, I feel that I am one
Now ready, united, I take a mighty leap
And for a moment I am free
But the freedom I felt fast flees from my heart
As quickly I’m approaching my end
Then in the split of a second it all grows quite clear –
The fault in my thinking & act –
I had “faith” to fly, but not God’s will
Nor even the wisdom to harness true flight
So here I pen for you some thoughts on the essence of real faith
That you shall not follow the haste in which I sealed my fate:
Faith’s a right knowledge of God & his perfect will for you
Followed by devoted action to make it all come true
(penned Sept 24, 2010 by a fan of flight & faith overlooking Bell’s Canyon from a large granite slab a top the lower falls)
We’re all on a journey. Boiled down, that journey is one of making sense out of our lives. We’re all just feeling along for the path that leads to happiness ((Happiness is often referred to in many different ways: salvation, eternal life, joy are all ways to refer to this)). Something essential to note is that we are all enshrouded by a fog of sorts ((“It is imperative to note that this mist of darkness descends on all the travelers—the faithful and the determined ones (the elect, we might even say) as well as the weaker and ungrounded ones.” (Jeffrey R. Holland, “Safety for the Soul,” Ensign, Nov 2009, 88–90, http://new.lds.org/general-conference/2009/10/safety-for-the-soul?lang=eng) )), which clouds the way on our journey and necessitates sincerity and diligence in seeking out the right path, the one that actually can deliver what we seek. This care wouldn’t be necessary if there was but one path and one voice vying for our devotion. But there are many voices, all demanding we worship them ((James E. Faust, “Voice of the Spirit”, Ensign, June 2006, 2–6, http://new.lds.org/ensign/2006/06/voice-of-the-spirit?lang=eng)). And not all lead to the same end.
Many Voices
These voices stand as the Sirens of old, calling for us to enjoy the journey after their fashion ((“Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die” http://scriptures.lds.org/en/2_ne/28/7-8#7)), failing to note, as many in advertising do, the hazards and consequences of buying their brand of “happiness” ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/2_ne/28/22#22, http://scriptures.lds.org/en/2_ne/26/22#22 One danger in continuing in our sins is that our desires so often change to fit our choices; therefor, while there’s always a way out (as Pres Uchtdorf testifies) we may, after long, have very little desire, hope or faith to look for it.)). For many however, the sleek packaging and bold sales assertions are assurance enough to convince them that indeed, THIS path will lead them to happiness. This is the the fog of which I spoke, the mist, the “smoke and mirrors” as they say. And this is why we must be proactive in examining the paths we take and the voices we heed.
The One Voice
Amid all the voices, there is a quiet one that speaks peace & comfort. It cannot be heard if we are active in listening to the vast endless noise that surrounds us daily ((See YouTube Video, “Voice of the Spirit” on https://www.ryanmendenhall.com/blog/2010/09/04/simplifying-stuff.htm)). It’s much too delicate to force its way into our lives. Its a voice that’s respectful of our desires and thus requires an invitation, and sincerity. Because it’s quiet, we too must be quiet if we are to hear it. It’s a voice that when heard can whisper good feelings to our hearts and calm clarity to our minds ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/dc/6/22-23#22, http://scriptures.lds.org/en/dc/9/7-9#9)). The language of this voice is love ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/1_jn/4/8#8)). We can be sure we feel it when we are filled with love for those around us. We know we have found it when we desire good for our fellow man ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/ether/4/12#12)).
Important to me, this pleasant voice fills us with love for ourselves, with hope and with assurance that the path we’re on is the one that truly leads to happiness & peace ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/moro/10/5#5)). The best part is that this remains true even when the voice is delivering reprimands or course corrections. Sirens, on the other hand, deliver either debilitating laden shame or avoidance infested apathy, but never peace coupled with the capacity to mount confidently the trials that we face as does the One True Voice.
This quiet voice that strengthens, teaches, comforts, guides, encourages, motivates, calms and clarifies is called by many names, but it is the Source of all truth and thus happiness ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/moro/10/22#22)). It is the One Voice we must learn let lead us. I call it the Holy Ghost or Spirit, but honest people in all religions and walks of life have felt its guidance and are happy because they listen and follow it. Through patience and practice in inviting, asking, listening & following we open up a world that can ONLY be seen by those who have walked this path. The key to opening the door to this world is prayer.
Prayer
Prayer at its most basic level is communication with the Source of Truth. In prayer we extend an invitation to the Source to be with us, to guide and lead us. This puts us in a place to hear its gentle words. In prayer we also bring to the table the questions that perplex us and that hold us back from peace and joy. We seek for softer hearts that allow us to see sweetness in what we are impressed upon to do, instead of fearing or feeling burdened ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/1_ne/2/16#16)). We also will often need courage and strength if we are to act on what we learn. This because these guidances are often stretching, but extremely rewarding if followed ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/1_ne/3/7#7)). Action is vital, because truth only becomes part of us as we live it and a life of truth is the only way to happiness. So, the principle of intent to act underscores the attitude we need have while we pray. When we resolve to act on what we come to learn through the quiet tutelage of the Spirit, even if practically it seems we need do another, we learn both how the Spirit speaks to us and how to trust in the One True Voice.
When we put ourselves in tune to hear the One Voice, the Holy Ghost or Voice of the Lord, that voice that fills a void in us that no other can, we are led and a whole new world of opportunities opens up for us! Much of our discontent and sadness stems from trying to fill that hole inside of us with that which the Siren’s tell us to fill it ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/alma/41/10#10, http://scriptures.lds.org/en/moro/10/22#22)). When we mistakenly follow the wrong voice to fill or mask our emptiness, it crowds out the only thing that can fit, the Only Source of real peace. I realize now that this is why I am being led to simplify my life. It’s to silence the incessant voices that drown out my ability to hear the Spirit. It’s to give place for the One Voice. The truth however is not had in simplification alone, but in the relationship I can then develop with the Truth, with God. Simplifying is a means to a much greater end, and many who do so find real peace. But again, this is because they can then commune with the Spirit so as to guide their lives towards happiness. When one connects with heaven, all other solutions at once take on meaning. Things that didn’t work before begin to work. It’s as if the breath of life is given to our efforts to give them new effectiveness & ability to serve us.
Knowing God
So then, what is it that will fill us, satisfy us and lead us to happiness? In essence, it is knowing God, the Source of Truth ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/john/17/3#3)). To know Him we must seek Him diligently ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/dc/88/63#63, )), sincerely ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/jer/29/13#13)) and early in our priorities ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/deut/4/29#29)). Why is this? Because again, He gave us our agency to choose and respects it so much that He only takes captain of our ship if we desire it ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/alma/29/4#4, https://www.ryanmendenhall.com/blog/2010/09/08/desire-determines-destiny.htm)) and ask Him to do so ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/james/4/3#3, http://scriptures.lds.org/en/1_jn/3/22#22)). In addition, to “know” someone in the biblical context was a pretty intimate experience. To know Him fully we must walk in his ways ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/john/7/17#17)). Summary: In short, to know God we must desire, seek, ask & act.
When in touch this way with the Great Source of Truth, when we are on the path of getting to know Truth we find confidence and peace of mind in life even amid the storms ((Richard G. Scott, “Peace of Conscience and Peace of Mind”, Ensign, Nov. 2004, 15–18, http://new.lds.org/ensign/2004/11/peace-of-conscience-and-peace-of-mind?lang=eng)). This is not because our problems have mystically dissolved or because there are no other voices still clamoring for our attention, but because we now know in whom to trust ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/2_ne/4/19#19)) and we have become stronger through faithfully acting on the insights and promptings we have received. We trust because we’ve learned to discern or decipher the One Voice from all others and we have an assurance, built of experience, that it will not lead us astray. We know that this Voice is different from the Sirens. While the Sirens may promise the same peace, we know they cannot deliver it. And while there have been times we didn’t understand the whys in the instruction of the Spirit, we were always given peace in knowing that we were being led in right way. We knew this because we felt deeply and meaningfully happy. THIS is the true peace in life, not “arriving,” but in knowing that on our journey we are led by guide that wants our happiness and will not fail to lead us down the path that will facilitate that happiness ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/1_ne/17/13#13)).
Rethinking Prayer
But, “it’s been so long. I don’t feel like I know how anymore,” you say? Perhaps you feel distant or like it’s too late for you, like you’re too far gone? Maybe you feel like you can no longer relate to the person you once were when you were taught to pray and doing it regularly?
No worries! If you sincerely are seeking happiness you have a God that wants nothing more than to welcome you home ((Parable of the Prodigal Son: http://scriptures.lds.org/en/luke/15/11-32#11)). If you are lost he will find you ((The Story of Amazing Grace: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lfoCSmw-EaE)).He sis a God of love…in fact, your Father. He will run to you when he sees you coming. He will take you as you are, wherever you are, no matter who you are. And when the God that gives you life meets again with you, he will help lift you to greater happiness. You are NEVER too far gone ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/isa/1/18#18)). He only wants your complete happiness, but not at the expense of forcing you to come to him.
Here are some ideas to help you rethink prayer and reestablish that connection with the Source of Peace.
Prayer’s easy, you can do it anywhere: in your head, out loud, on paper, in a box or with a fox, it really doesn’t matter. You’ll typically start off by acknowledging The Source of all Truth from whom you seek answers. It’s kinda like looking at a friend when you’re having a conversation with them, it just establishes who you’re talking with. Then just start up a conversation! Share your feelings. Open up about your frustrations. Confide in him your doubts. If you’re angry, express why. Do you feel lost? Tell Him. How about lonely? He’s listening.You can tell him ANYTHING and should.
It seems like such a common experience to forget who we are. The unhappiness that stems from that, while not always immediately apparent, always seems to settle down upon us in some form of “I feel like I’m just missing something” kind of experience. Prayer is all about remembering who we are and who God is.
Realizing that He knows all, sees all, has all power, is completely just, merciful and loves us more than anyone ever can can give us confidence to pray to our Father in Heaven. Prayer is the process of submitting our desires to Him so they can take them and purify them, change them ((“Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on: you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of — throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself.” (Mere Christianity, 1952) )). Through seeking regularly this “change of heart” we slowly begin to desire only those things that lead to happiness ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/mosiah/5/2#2, http://scriptures.lds.org/en/alma/13/12#12)). Why is this? Because the desires we feed are the ones that grow. So even if your desire to be happy is small at present, start by asking what you can do now that that will TRULY make you happy. Then thank Him and act upon the impression you receive ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/alma/32/27-28#27)). You most likely will not receive something grand or huge. The Lord of Truth works by small and simple ways to bring about great things in our lives ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/alma/37/6#6)). And this is also how he teaches us, one lesson of trust at a time ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/2_ne/28/30-31#30)). So, even if it’s to call up a friend and see how they are doing, feel grateful that you just had an experience with getting to know the Spirit. 🙂 It’s by doing this over and over again that we walk by faith, having the Spirit light our path just enough to know what to do right now. This is known as the talent of spirituality and is a learnable skill just like any other. Thus, it grows with practice.
An vital principle that many stumble on that of obedience. It is only through obedience that can we be happy. You see, obedience is not a trap door. It’s not a chain or a cage. Take for example obedience to the laws of gravity and of flight. This allows us to soar high and travel much faster and farther in a shorter period of time. Similarly, a kite, while tethered to a string is able to reach much higher than if it were allow to “be free”. All soaring in personal happiness comes through obedience to the laws that rule the skies of joy ((http://scriptures.lds.org/en/dc/130/20-21#21)).
To Wrap it Up…
Because of the darkness that surrounds us all to one degree or another, we can quite easily fall into confusion about life, fear of the unknown and ultimately wandering around looking unsuccessfully for resolutions to our challenges in life. But while none escape the mists of darkness ((http://new.lds.org/general-conference/2009/10/safety-for-the-soul?lang=eng)), none are left without a guiding light that’s never further away than a sincere prayer. Our Father in Heaven is the very Source of the guidance we need to keep from being deceived by the floods of voices that rush in and call us in every direction as we struggle to find meaning, answers and peace. If you desire these the peace that no voice can deliver but one, humble yourself to seek God’s Spirit. Follow the lessons you learn, for they are intimate proofs that God loves you. In this place you will find comfort, confidence, motivation (even if you lack it now) and so many more good gifts he seeks to share with you.
It is my firm belief that God loves you and me more than we can even imagine. I also have sought many times the Spirit of which I’ve spoken. When I am sincere God does not hold back the heavens from revealing his love and leadership. It is this relationship that gives meaning to everything I do and when I wander, I feel the gentle tug to return, like a child standing at my side, softly imploring me with innocent, but wise eyes. I know my Savior lives. He is God’s son and came to make everything I wrote of here possible. I share my gratitude to him for his love for me and for comforting me in my darkest moments. My invitation: Reach out to him. He will calm your raging seas. He is the Source of all Truth, Light and Love.
So, over the course of my years hear on earth I’ve experienced good friends and family members falling from the faith of their fathers. I used to hear others share stories of this and felt pretty protected from it. I had powerhouse friends, we were solid. We would occasionally do stupid things, but we weren’t going anywhere. This was how it was and this is how it would always be. I was wrong.
Between the moving I did as a kid, a missionary and a college student I would often part with good people whom I had grown to love deeply. Some I have met again and rejoiced as Alma did when he again met with the Sons of Mosiah after some time apart, “and what added more to his joy, they were still his brethren in the Lord; yea, and they had waxed strong in the knowledge of the truth; for they were men of a sound understanding and they had searched the scriptures diligently, that they might known the world of God” (Alma 17:2). Others I have spoken with in sorrow that their faith had waned when the heat of the sun beat down upon them. While not my decision in the end, I have often wondered, what could I have done more to support them through their trials?
Friend after friend has also shared with me similar stories and it’s very interesting to observe in myself what I’ve see happen in others. It’s that thing that starts to happen when we slowly let slip the values and truths that we hold dear. I once was bold and confident to say that going to church has never really been a problem for me. Then I find myself skipping here and there. I wonder if those that left did the same thing early on, when asked where I was, I made up a plausible excuse for my nonattendance.
What is it that makes us shut down with our peers and our people? Why do we retreat when we need to open up? Perhaps it was my overconfidence supported by statements of loved ones praising my faithfulness that allowed me to think I was above the possibility of personal apostasy. Was it this pride that shielded me from the dangers lurking just below the surface of the calm water. All is NOT well in Zion.
I’m not saying that I’ve left the church, because I haven’t. I am saying however, that I recognize just how easily it can happen.
Masterful and sarcastic atheist Richard Dawkins has put much of his life’s attention into repeatedly attempting to convince his fellow apes that there is no such thing as God. I typically come across his stuff in discussions with a good friend or on the web/video when I’m strong in my faith, but he’s the last person I’d like to meet in a dark ally when I’m wallowing in self-pity about my worth as a human being. He and the faithless like him seem to have little compassion for the struggles those of the faithful, likening religion to an common activity like needle point or some other quaint hobby. Perhaps his parents were killed by believers who put him in a “Brave New World” like reeducation chamber where he was pumped full of medication and repeatedly told that the earth was flat. That would probably get under my skin as well.
But enough with my character assassination. Mr. Dawkins, I apologize, I don’t like to do that.You just represent to me a much bigger idea that’s tormented man from the beginning. I have absolutely no problems with questions, it’s in our nature to seek to know them, but when cynicism and doubt lead to closing off answers rather then letting them in, I see folly. I think on this point we can agree. It may just be in different contexts. By the way, I love science, my mind is always examining the world around me seeking to understand. So again, no hard feelings? Good, let’s do lunch. My treat.
Others who follow Dawkin’s faithless line of thinking have even compared belief in God to a praying to a luck horseshoe. Aside from the obvious differences here, I can’t help but see these arguments as mirroring the advent of Korihor in the Book of Mormon who said amongst other troubling teachings that the believers were “bound down under a foolish and a vain hope” (Alma 30:13). He calls God nothing more than a fairy tale akin to unicorns or hobgoblins. Will be interesting to see who the emperor is who is not wearing any clothes. (Check out: Countering Korihor’s Philosophy)
To start my babblings a winding down: There are times when our roots run deep and the wind comes, the storm rages on and we stand firm in the faith. There are other times when all it takes is negative thoughtless comment from a fellow saint to shake our very core. Well, let those who bend in the wind to the pressures of daily living, I offer you my faith in a God that lives and loves his children. And when things seem hard to understand, just hold on, call me if you need, the light will come for those who seek.
Firm are the decrees
of God from above
Seeing all, he knows
the necessity of love
But in his wisdom
he allows us to grow
And growth requires patience,
the ability to go slow
So down here in our passions
we worry and fret
Convinced that if God loved us
he’s step in and set
Right all the injustices
we see man do to man
Failing to recognize
God’s perfect plan
And no, it’s not to torture,
to abandon or abuse
But rather to give agency,
our choice to properly use
It’s in this way alone
that our growth can be whole
We take what’s allotted
and devote to it our soul
For you see, in the end
he who finishes ahead
Is he who finds freedom
through God as his head
“My will” delivers one thing –
chains that rightly bind
And “thy will” quite another –
Faith, the power to heal mankind
God bless my hurting friends and family.
May you recognize in your lonely times that God is speaking to us always.
And how true it is that when we draw near unto him that he draws near unto us.
